Everyone seems to be stuck in their little worlds, but at the same time they seem to have the impression that their problems are big... but then again size is relative... argh! i could go round for ever arguing a side for everyone... thats what true justice is - she goes around arguing everybodys case - no matter what... as for pretty much any argument - a for and against reason can be found...
The only thing that is keeping me from going crazy is that i know people i love and care about, it would hurt. in my darkest hours i can't see how this whole mental existance has first, come in to being, and second got into the state its in now... and then flip side, everything make sense and is perfectly fine & simple.
I'm guessing everyone else gets this type of thing, i mean i can't be the only one - i don't place myself that highly - but it is just unbelievable how much perspective can change just from within one person... the range across many people must be rediculous.
I don't get how people can hate so much, sure i get angry, but fucking relax... okay, you're making life shit for the rest of us who just want to get along. Can't you find anything else to interest your rediculous mind?!?
ARGH! sorry on a mental rant at the moment, anger is coursing thru me for no apparant reason at the moment - apart from the fact that - as usual everything is fine but at the same time going completely wrong. Its all happening in such balanced doses that i can't complain about anything or let off any steam...!.!.
So i appologise to people reading this but i am currently using this to offload some annoyance at the moment... why the hell is it seen as alright in our culture that you should look after number one and thats it...! I, myself would be quite happy helping out others just because it makes me feel good.
Why do people have to loose their innocence and beauty, harden their shell - just because a few twats out there think they can own the world and that everyone else should fall into line... or that they can take advantage of someones kind disposition... i say a few because most of us just fall into line as we believe its the only way to survive - but some people actually have this way of living built into them?!?! ----- its so fucking messed up and the wrong way round - nice people should be ruling the world - and nobody seems to be doing anything about it because they are happy in what they do and what they get - or at least their not happy because they are taught to always want more - but they are "safe" and making it "easy" for themselves. Its also down to fear because if anyone tries to stand against the flow its a difficult route to take and looses you friends and sanity (fun!)
Ok, sorry about this, this is currently one viewpoint that my mind has temporarily slipped into - and because the human mind can hold more that it can proccess, i find myself falling into moods that are completely seperate or contradictory from the other. The person that comes across in reality is a mixture of all these views and extreme feelings - but while i'm in the moment - pure angles come across from where i was at the time of writing. and i'm currently at the top of a high cliff with a storm above, listening to the pixies while i watch the turmoil of a stomry sea below.
Ok this probably isn't making any sense - but at least its helping me chill out a bit... (sheepish-grin)
s i g h
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